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“And the spelling,” added Paul.“Oh yeah?” the obvious bully snorted, his hands on his hips. “Well why don’t you geniuses enlighten us!”The two nine-year-olds looked at each other and grinned.“Bruce and Lucy sittin’ in a tree,” they chanted together, “F-U-C-K-I-N-G!”The gang of older kids looked shocked. They had of course heard the word before; most of them used it. But to hear a couple of younger kids claiming to actually DO it was more than they were prepared for.“First comes love,” ‘Bruce’ continued.“Then comes sex,” ‘Lucy’ added.“Then comes those special pills you’re gonna have to start taking as soon as you get your period,” ‘Bruce’ finished.With that ‘Bruce and Lucy’ began making out, with full-on French kissing and a tight embrace. The gang of older kids moved on, their leader muttering something about kids who were too young for that. Paul and Paula laughed so hard they were in danger of falling out of the tree.“That’s the first time we’ve ever done that in front of anybody!”. ."Jack, how does a moderately healthy guy just this side of Thirty die" Well "self" maybe next time you'll unplug the toster before you try to pry out a Pillsbury Toaster Strudle with a butterknife...while high.So yeah I got zapped with 50,000 volts and died alone in my underwear and a Spice World T-shirt (it's comfy...don't judge!).The next thing I knew I was standing up looking down at myself. You really learn alot about life watching the smoke waft up from your burnt out eyesockets. The ultimate irony came when I tried to leave the apartment and found that I couldn't. I hardly ever went out in life, why would death be any different. When my body was finally discovered I couldn't even go with it (still don't know what happened to it, hope it was a good funeral!)It didn't really dawn on me that I was dead until they came to pack up my stuff. As I watched workmen pack up my most treasured belongings I couldn't help but wonder where it would go. I found myself alone, in an empty.
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